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They were astonished at what they were seeing but at this point Jane relaxed a little and looking round at them all, she seemed to suddenly realise what she had just done and turned to me with a look of shock on her face. “What did you do!” she said, she turned her chair back to face the table and looking hard at the table top, frowning and red faced, she was clearly not very pleased at being embarrassed like that in front of all these people. She looked really cross as she said, “Come on let’s get out of here this is too embarrassing.” Then she closed her eyes and clenched her teeth and I could tell she was already starting with the same feelings again. She tried to get up but leaned over the table, her knees pressed together and her whole body tensed, then she looked up at me and started shaking her head. She gasped, “Ohh, ohh that feels amazing,” and collapsed back into the chair. At this point I decided that I had been perhaps a bit mean blowing it twice. It was pretty. Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, I’m gone.Your EX-Wife.Don’t try to find me. Your BROTHER & I are moving to New Zealand together! Have a great life!REPLY:Dear Ex-wife, Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.It’s true you & I have been married for 20 years, although a good woman is a far cry from what you’ve been. I watch TV soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining & bitching. Too bad that doesn’t work anymore.I DID notice when you got a hair do last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a boy!’ Since my father raised me not to say anything, if you can’t say something nice, I didn’t comment ... and when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have got me confused with MY BROTHER because I haven’t eaten prawns for 7 years.About the new nightie: I turned away from you because the $299.99 price tag was still on it, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed $300.
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